Grown Up Conversations Teachable Moments – Day 1

Naaman’s Maid

Be brave enough to heal yourself even when it hurts. A young girl is taken from her hometown and is forced to serve the boss’s wife. Most women at some point in their lives find themselves dealing with unresolved issues rising out of circumstances outside of their control, disappointment, fear, low self-esteem, anxiety, frustration, and sometimes even their own bad choices.

The challenge is, ‘Are you brave enough to heal yourself even when it hurts?’

Naaman wife’s maid was a young girl who had a voice, but her name was not mentioned in the Bible. Vice-versa in the real world today – You have a name but many times you do not have a voice – unable to speak up for yourself. As grownup women let us end the imaginary competition to compete. Make an intellectual decision to come together and stand against the evils of our culture. The world out there is cold and harsh.

Who would have envisioned a nameless girl forced into slavery would be the catalyst God would use to bring healing to a wealthy family? Naaman was a powerful man in his country BUT he had a rare skin disease that no amount of money could have cured. Divine destiny can sometimes be disguised either by being nameless or not having a voice.

This slave girl had her step forward moment to be brave enough to heal herself even when it hurts and to selflessly use her voice alerting her boss to the Healer. She confidently says to her mistress, “If only my master were with the prophet who is in Samaria! For he would heal him of his leprosy.” (2 Kings 5:3) Someone once said, “I am not what has happened to me. I am what I choose to become.”

Repeat it out loud for those sitting in the back of the room – I AM NOT WHAT HAS HAPPENED TO ME. I AM WHAT I CHOOSE TO BECOME!

Sometimes the situations that you find yourself in can be the greatest God-given opportunity if only you choose to step forward leaving the victim mentality behind you. You cannot allow anyone or everything to deter you from reaching your full potential. It is unproductive to wait for the bad events in life to go away before you declare your freedom.

This girl could have ignored her master’s disability and become bitter being held against her will but instead she acted in bravery bringing healing to herself and those within her circle. She teaches us that sometimes life hands you a stack of cards that make you anonymous, invisible, exasperated, worried, or even sometimes your own bad choices places you at a disadvantage – but regardless of the wrongs we can change the storyline.

The only thing this slave girl had going for her was her faith in God’s healing powers. She did not limit her self-worth to being a slave without a name, but she was prepackaged as miracle to give her master something that his wealth could not afford. We all face difficult battles in lives no matter what image we paint on the outside.

The school of hard knocks is designed in a way to bring out the best in us and not the wounds. It teaches you the difference between ordinary and extraordinary. The whole world will go blind if we decide to engage in revenge or as some women call it ‘karma’.

For every crisis that you face there is a Christ waiting to heal. In closing, your lemons could have been prepackaged to bring healing to you and to those who once held you captive.

‘Be the kind of GROWNUP that when your feet hit the floor each morning the devil says, “Oh crap, she’s up!” Whatever is holding you emotionally hostage requires courage to change the narrative and to have empathy on your offenders to break the cycle of resentment.


Stay close to people who love to laugh. Hope you choose to be happy rather than bitter. It’s time to get your smile on.

May your weekend be filled with everything you were longing to do with everyone who makes you happy.

Happy weekend to you and yours. See you on Monday!!!

Thursday Morning Grown Up Conversations – Videos (1&2)

Peace over Panic

When the struggle is real your confidence in the Lord can be shaken. One trouble after another makes you want to stay away from God spiralling you into a deep dark rabbit hole. Then sure enough some folks around you may question –  “Where is your God?” making the problems feel ten times worse.

In moments like these let us remember that anything we face can be overruled by the Lord when you least expect it.

One word from the Lord can calm every storm, and reset your life turning bitter complaints into happy dances. Let us never think that the God who created us has forgotten us in our mess.

The Psalmist David said that when he felt discouraged, he challenged himself to take on a positive attitude. He preached to himself, he encouraged himself, and in the nighttime, he fixed his eyes on God.

God does not expect us to have all the answers to why bad things happen to good people but based on Psalm 42 we are encouraged to preach to ourselves and encourage ourselves to put our hope in God.

Peace over Panic. Faith over Fear. We will not just go through problems, but we are going to grow through everything that interrupts our peace.

Psalms 42 NKJV

As the deer pants for the water brooks, so pants my soul for You, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. When shall I come and appear before God?

My tears have been my food day and night, while they continually say to me, “Where is your God?”

When I remember these things, I pour out my soul within me. For I used to go with the multitude; I went with them to the house of God with the voice of joy and praise, with a multitude that kept a pilgrim feast.

Why are you cast down, O my soul? And why are you disquieted within me? Hope in God, for I shall yet praise Him. For the help of His countenance.

O my God, my soul is cast down within me; therefore I will remember You from the land of the Jordan, and from the heights of Hermon, from the Hill Mizar.

Deep calls unto deep at the noise of Your waterfalls; all Your waves and billows have gone over me.

The Lord will command His lovingkindness in the daytime, and in the night His song shall be with me – a prayer to the God of my life.

I will say to God my Rock, “Why have You forgotten me? Why do I go mourning because of the oppression of the enemy?”

As with a breaking of my bones, my enemies reproach me, while they say to me all day long, “Where is your God?”

Why are you cast down, O my soul? And why are you disquieted within me? Hope in God; For I shall yet praise Him, the help of my countenance and my God.

Wednesday Morning Grown Up Conversations – Video

Why Rehearse what God can easily Erase?

Courage we all need. The experiences that hold us prisoners lies in our belief that there’s nothing more beyond what has happened to us. Courage is the ability to let go of the pain that you are familiar with and be brave enough not to compare your life with others. Be daring enough to step outside of the environment that got you sick.

Do not sit in the gloom. Allow God to bring His light and rescue you. Stop rehearsing what God is willing to erase. It is easy for humans to trust their own wisdom, experience, friends, and their resources but the Psalmist David knew to have the kind of courage and strength he needed – it had to come from the LORD.

No one lives in seasons of fair weather where life is great all the time. You stumble and fall but because your confidence is in the LORD, you will not live permanently in fear of getting up and starting again. For in the time of trouble God hides you and sets you high upon a rock. God does not prevent you from trouble, but He gives you security and blessing even in the midst of the uncertainty.

Psalm 27 makes a powerful prayer to pray everyday.

The Lord is my light and my salvation – whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life – of whom shall I be afraid? When the wicked advance against me to devour me, it is my enemies and my foes who will stumble and fall.

Though an army besiege me, my heart will not fear; though war break out against me, even then I will be confident.

One thing I ask from the Lord, this only do I seek; that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze on the beauty of the Lord and to seek him in his temple.

For in the day of trouble he will keep me safe in his dwelling; he will hide me in the shelter of his sacred tent and set me high upon a rock. Then my head will be exalted above the enemies who surround me; at his sacred tent I will sacrifice with shouts of joy; I will sing and make music to the Lord.

Hear my voice when I call, Lord; be merciful to me and answer me. My heart says of you, “Seek his face!” Your face, Lord, I will seek. Do not hide your face from me, do not turn your servant away in anger; you have been my helper.

Do not reject me or forsake me, God my Savior. Though my father and mother forsake me, the Lord will receive me. Teach me your way, Lord; lead me in a straight path because of my oppressors. Do not turn me over to the desire of my foes, for false witnesses rise up against me, spouting malicious accusations.

I remain confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living.

Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.

Tuesday Morning Grown Up Conversations – Video

Who or What is Your Place of Safety?

One of most important things we can be assured of is –  the Holy Bible was written to give us HOPE in every situation we will ever face in life. No good or bad event in our life here on earth takes God by surprise. You maybe caught off guard by a curve ball that sent you spiralling into past pain yet in quietness and strength you snatch back your peace.

God will save you from hidden dangers and from deadly diseases. You can go to him for protection. He will cover you like a bird spreading its wings over its babies. Sometimes we need comfort, sometimes instruction, while at other times we need to know we are not alone and sure as the sun will rise in the morning His warring angels keep watch over us.

When faced with many unanswered questions we know that everything will work together for our good as we remain connected to God. Everyone who kneels before God can stand before anything and anyone.

Psalm 91 Easy-to-Read Version

You can go to God Most High to hide. You can go to God All-Powerful for protection.

I say to the Lord, “You are my place of safety, my fortress. My God, I trust in you.” God will save you from hidden dangers and from deadly diseases. You can go to him for protection. He will cover you like a bird spreading its wings over its babies.

You can trust him to surround and protect you like a shield. You will have nothing to fear at night and no need to be afraid of enemy arrows during the day. You will have no fear of diseases that come in the dark or terrible suffering that comes at noon.

A thousand people may fall dead at your side or ten thousand right beside you, but nothing bad will happen to you! All you will have to do is watch, and you will see that the wicked are punished.

You trust in the Lord for protection. You have made God Most High your place of safety. So nothing bad will happen to you. No diseases will come near your home.

He will command his angels to protect you wherever you go. Their hands will catch you so that you will not hit your foot on a rock. You will have power to trample on lions and poisonous snakes.

The Lord says, “If someone trusts me, I will save them. I will protect my followers who call to me for help. When my followers call to me, I will answer them. I will be with them when they are in trouble.

I will rescue them and honor them. I will give my followers a long life and show them my power to save.”

Where do you go for Advice? Video

Monday morning Grown Up Conversations

We all sometimes struggle to find words to express our feelings. That is why God gave us the Psalms. For many people whether followers of Jesus Christ or not – we have found a Psalm that expresses our feelings along the journey of life. For me, I can say many times when I struggle to articulate my feelings, I have found Psalms to be a book of solace.

When we are sad or disheartened, there is a Psalms to soothe our anxieties and fears and to show us how to safely vent into the ear of our caring Heavenly Father. Even feelings of anger and bitterness find a quiet place of honesty as in Psalm 73:16-17 “When I tried to understand all this, it troubled me deeply till I entered the sanctuary of God; then I understood their final destiny.”

You are not alone when it comes to feeling overwhelmed like riding a roller-coaster of emotions. We are all susceptible to unexplained feelings but how we manage those feelings determine if we are winning or losing the war.

Have you ever tried to use a screwdriver when you really needed a hammer? Frustrating experience. But that has nothing to do with the screwdriver – you just chose the wrong tool.

Let the conversation gets started – All week I will be using the Book of Psalms as my conversational pieces.

Psalm 1

Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the ungodly, nor stands in the path of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers; but his delight is in the law of the Lord, and in His law he meditates day and night.

He will be like a tree planted by the rivers of water, that brings forth its fruit in its season; its leaf will not wither, and whatever he does will prosper.

The ungodly are not so but are like the chaff which the wind drives away.

Therefore, the ungodly will not stand in the judgment, nor sinners in the congregation of the righteous.

For the Lord knows the way of the righteous, but the way of the ungodly will perish.

God charts the road you take. The road they take is Skid Row.

We’ve got this!

It’s that time of the week when the world falls in love. It’s FRIYAH! SATYAH! SUNYAH! When life hands you lemons make something resembling lemonade. There’s always something to be thankful for.

Just dropping in to say, ‘Have a great weekend. Let’s get it started with our smiles.

Wishing you an amazing fun filled weekend. Whatever you do make sure you are happy.

Outclassed them All

The beauty of a woman is not in her facial appearance, but the true beauty of a woman is reflected in her spirit. It is the happiness she brings to everyone after they leave her company. Do not let anyone or anything dull your sparkle regardless of who or where it comes from.

Steve Harvey once had a comedy show –  “Don’t trip … He ain’t through with me yet.’

For many of us we see beauty with our naked human eyes completely missing the fact that God is still working on all of us. In the meantime, let us not trip and mess up someone else’s beauty while we are all still becoming. Be patient with me and others – God is still working on us.

Everyone and everything have some form of beauty, but the sad reality is, not everyone sees it.

Being genuine and respecting others expose the true beauty of a person. When you leave people better than you met them that is a class act. I have deep respect for someone’s personal values and morals than their physical features.

Let me get a little biblical here for a moment – Proverbs 31:29 says, “Charm can mislead, and beauty soon fades. The woman to be admired and praised is the woman who lives in the Fear-of-God.”

The true beauty of a woman is in the way she speaks. She speaks with wisdom and honest coaching. She is never found idle. Her strength and self-respect are her clothing line/brand. Her confidence is found in God. Her honesty is based on practice rather than theory. She takes pride in making others feel comfortable around her.

 A beautiful woman has the courage to stand up for others and is happy being herself. She cannot afford to make a fool of herself by gulping wine and behaving inappropriately for fear that she does not know right from wrong, and the people who depend on her gets hurt.

A beautiful woman speaks up for the people who have no voice and stands up for the poor. She always has something worthwhile to say, and she always says it kindly. Don’t go tripping, we all are a work in progress. Be patient with me and with others because God is still on the job. As beautiful women we will laugh at the days to come.

Do not take membership with the group of women who enjoys an argument or strife. As much as in you live at peace with all. Strife, quarrels, arguments, controversy, contentious issues, anything leading to petty issues avoid. Run! Flee! It is not worth your character or status quo. Ego will destroy you and you will fail at every performance.  

Charm can mislead and beauty soon fades. The woman to be admired and praised is the woman who lives in the Fear-of-God. It cost $0.00 to be a kind human being. Live with two attributes everyday – be full of thanks and give. Be kind! Be amazing! Be grateful! The end result of how you lived will always be your best eulogy.

“Elegance is when the inside is as beautiful as the outside.” Coco Chanel

What is your Assignment?

If you are a grown up and still feel like your life has a missing link, there is good possibility that you have lost your enthusiasm because you have pretty much outgrown your environment or your network of friends and acquaintances.

Life becomes monotonous when you stay in the same environment for too long. You are not a tree so surround yourself with humans who will inspire and motivate you. You lose enthusiasm staying around the same folks who have done the same thing everyday for the last decades of their lives.

Remember if you hang out with small minded people you will become stagnated causing premature death to the dreams hidden within you. Never doubt your value by selling yourself at a discounted price. Everything you do today will either make your future brighter or kill your potential.

It is better to be alone working on yourself than to find yourself consistently in the wrong company. When you become part of a team that is winning the conversations are different. One thing I have proven as an adult – when you begin to work on becoming a better version of yourself people will openly start to judge you. And that is fine – your environment was destroying your roots of possibilities until you were forced out of your confinement.

There is just too much to do before your time expires to get caught up with approval ratings or meaningless drama. Someone said, “Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discus people. Ladies, it is your turn do something that younger self will be eternally grateful for. There is a little girl on the inside of you screaming to grow up.

Forgive yourself when you did not know better but now that you do – it is the right time to change the conversations. Every human being has a God-ordained right to shift their focus for the betterment of themselves and those after them.

It is time to set your goals so big that it will make your previous acquaintances and friends become uncomfortable hanging around you. Let others argue over small things once you do not lose sleep over  the minor things in life. Refuse to stay in an environment that is not helping you to grow mentally, emotionally, or spiritually.

Sometimes we fall before we can stand and that is okay. The next time you try to stand you would have conquered the fear of falling. There are successful women out there who will help you to succeed when they see you trying. Do not stop until your dreams scare you. After a few knocks you become tougher and more resilient and the doors come swinging open before you.

When you look back let it bring you joy to see how far you have come from where you were before. Refuse to lose zeal no matter how many times you stumble. The school of hard knocks is the best learning ground despite the sore muscles. Accept your grown-up status by blocking out the negativity and changing the conversations around the table.

With God on your side you will become fearless and stay calm like a baby. Ask God for one thing and that is to stay close to Him. It is the only quiet and secure place in a noisy and nosey world. It is the perfect place away from the buzz of human traffic. God holds your head and shoulders above all who try to pull you down.


Let your smile change the world. Don’t let the world change your smile.

It’s FRIDAY! Never regret anything that makes you smile.

Happy Weekend! Breathe! Relax! You will be as happy as you decide to be.