Tuesday Morning in October – Grown Up Conversations

Reputation vs Character


 “It takes 20 years to build a reputation and five minutes to ruin it.”

“Worry about your character and not your reputation, because your CHARACTER is WHO YOU ARE, and your REPUTATION is what PEOPLE THINK OF YOU.”

Proverbs 22:1 – “A good name is to be chosen rather than great riches, loving favor rather than silver and gold.”

A person with a good reputation is looked up to as an outstanding leader in the village. It’s within the village you are known for who you are. Become a person who will do what you say and will go out of your way to help others reach their goals. Making others feel good about themselves speaks more about you than the title you carry.

Being consistent and doing what’s right especially when no one is watching are added jewels in your crown.

A bad reputation is unpardonable, and it’s unmasked by our attitude, behavior, and lack of good morals. It’s hard to recover from having a bad reputation.

We all make mistakes but sometimes an error can linger on in the minds of others ruining our reputation. As grown ups our reputation stalks our every move. We are at this stage to live life with limited regrets.

Proverbs 22:29, “Seest thou a man diligent in his business? He shall stand before kings; he shall not stand before mean men.” Your gift makes room for you at the top while idleness will make you eat crumbs off someone else’s table. 

I find it difficult to be impressed by how big and influential someone may be until I see how they secretly handle their wealthy friends, the custodian, the low-income person, or someone who has nothing to give back in return.

Romans 12: 9-10 “Love from the center of who you are; don’t fake it. Run for dear life from evil; hold on for dear life to good. Be good friends who love deeply; practice playing second fiddle. Don’t burn out; keep yourselves fueled and aflame. Be alert servants of the Master, cheerfully expectant. Don’t quit in hard times; pray all the harder. Help needy Christians; be inventive in hospitality.”

Simply rules to follow when CHARCTER MATTERS:

  • Love from the center of who you are
  • Don’t fake it
  • Run for dear life from evil
  • Hold on for dear life to good
  • Be good friends with who love deeply
  • Practice playing second fiddle
  • Don’t burn out
  • Keep yourselves fueled and aflame
  • Be friends of God
  • Don’t quit in hard times
  • Pray all the harder
  • Help the needy
  • Be practical in generosity

Quote: “Watch your thoughts – they lead to your attitudes. Watch your attitudes – they lead to words. Watch your words – they lead to actions. Watch your actions – they lead to habits. Watch your habits – they form your character. Watch your character – it determines your destiny.”

PRAYER TIME: Lord, teach us to be true to what we believe even when under stress or peer pressure. Let our reputation be never tainted by any undesirable act or thought. Let us never be fake but remain relevant to the people in my life. In Jesus Name, Amen

Monday Morning in October – Grown Up Conversations

Stay at Peace

I pray that we as grown ups will be very selective in our battles. If we fight everything that disturbs our peace, we will be too tired to fight the essential ones.

Romans 12:18 “If possible, to the best of your ability, live at peace with all people.”

We are encouraged to do all that we can to live in peace with everyone. Life has taught us as grown ups that choice is the most powerful tool we have. At any point in life we can change the course simply by one choice.

I believe that every human being secretly desires to live at peace with each other, but Satan hates affectionate relatives, friends, co-workers, neighbors. His job is to keep us at war with each other. It gets tricky to live at peace with everyone and to set healthy boundaries that’s why it’s extremely important to keep your daily interactions with like-minded people. It makes life simpler.

When relationships are put to the test-  discipline yourself to gain strength, wisdom, and knowledge from God’s Word. Don’t trade your peace or godly values and principles for agreement. Leave it with God. Some battles you may lose – but maintaining your peace is the goal.

Your real enemy is Satan himself – not people. He attacks with full force because he knows that he has a short time to create unnecessary hostility thereby bringing instability in our mind, body, and soul. But God offers us a peace that super exceeds our expectations which speaks to our heart and mind. God will keep you at peace even where there maybe conflict.

Inquire of the LORD and wait until the LORD gives you instructions. Living in peace is an attitude and way of life, which can help us live well and with purpose, even during difficult times. Living in peace means we are at peace with who we are. Decide what is important and don’t sweat the little things.

Peace is only possible in our society where all human beings feel valued. But your personal place of peace is critical – it comes from true happiness with yourself. You have no control over anyone else’s behavior so guard your peace and trust that it will influence those around you. Peace is living, sleeping, eating, and appreciating the goodness of the Lord. It happens when you feel at peace with yourself. Be happy to be the person you are, flaws and everything.

Psalms 91:13-15 says, ‘You will overpower the strongest lions and the most deadly snakes. The Lord says, “If you truly love me and truly know who I am, I will rescue you and keep you safe. When you are in trouble, call out to me. I will answer and be there to protect and honor you.”

PRAYER TIME: Father, thank you that everything that concerns us concerns you. You know the areas where we become vulnerable to outside activities creating mental disturbance. Protect us from things outside our control that are not good for our mental state. Give us the strength to hold our peace and to sleep well at nights. In Jesus Name, Amen.


Today we will choose only to think of the positive. We’re alive and well. We have a roof over our heads. We have a pretty sound mind.

Thank you God for the many blessings that are to others just a dream.

Relax everyone! Let’s make time to laugh again.

To all – have a wonderful weekend. Stay safe! Stay well!

Grown Up Conversations

Be Alert!

It’s no fun when we wake up feeling overly anxious about life and feeling like a failure. The question is, Do we understand who is behind all of this?

The Bible says in Luke 22:31 that Satan has demanded PERMISSION to vigorously shake our faith in God with the sole purpose of bringing on discouragement  Jesus is praying for us. Satan’s goal is to weaken our faith in God.

Someone said, “A man can live about 40 days without food, about three days without water, about eight minutes without air, but only ONE SECOND WITHOUT HOPE.”

Our thoughts control the traffic in our brains and makes it feel like rush hour on a busy highway. Our thoughts create panic, and fear – driving us into a state of despair and depression. After sitting alone stuck in a thought traffic jam we wake up with a tangled wrecked mind.

To be honest we human beings make life more complicated than our heavenly Father designed life to be. God is already working on the things you have been worried about. When things are outside our control we panic. And to add to the madness we pretend that everything is perfect until we crash.

Another unfortunate scenario is that we become obsessed with competing to be better than our circle of friends, and if that fails, we go into seclusion. The biggest mistake is when we become preoccupied with other people’s opinions – never a good idea. Dreams die there. We spend every waking moment analyzing everything in our lives. No wonder we end up depressed and saddened.

The truth is nobody has it ALL together. Everyone of us have our very own demons that we are hourly battling with. Remember that Satan has demanded permission from God to vigorously shake our faith/hope with the sole purpose of crumbling our trust in God.

Satan’s job is to steal our hope, to kill our confidence in God and to push us over the edge. But for those who choose to have a relationship with God, we are comforted with the truth that Jesus is praying for us that our faith will not fail.

Every time the devil attacks your mind with fearful and anxious thoughts say this, “The battle is LORD’S” The person who just won that big contract now must face bigger challenges to make it successful. The mother of that beautiful newborn baby has a long road ahead of her as her nights turn to days and her days feels like a doctor on 24 hours call.

Is it possible that we are frustrating our own selves by believing we are all writing the same chapters, so we become saddened by watching other people’s chapters? Life is not meant to be a competition.

Gentle reminder, naked without clothes we made our grand entry into this world…and naked without clothes, house, degrees, cars, spouses, children, professions…we are all leaving this world. So, what profit is it if we gain all the wisdom, reach the peak of our careers, only to become disenchanted…feeling like a failure?

Success doesn’t guarantee anyone happiness. What if life didn’t turn out the way we hoped it would have? Failure should never lead to death of body, mind, or spirit.

Life is not meant to live without Jesus. If we find ourselves losing our peace – it’s a warning sign that our thoughts are under an attack. Trust in the LORD forever and lean not on our own understanding.

Quote: “When a train goes through a tunnel and it gets dark, you don’t throw away the ticket away and jump off. You sit still and trust the engineer. Trust God today no matter what how dark your situation.

God says, “You are coming out.”

Grown Up Conversations

The Little Irritants in Our Lives

GOD CAN FIX everything that transpired in your life whether by error or by your own choices. Don’t sweat the small stuff. Very often we carry around weight that is way too heavy for us because someone did not apologize to us or we refuse to accept someone’s apology. At this point it’s causing you more harm than good so why not let it go?

Building walls with the hope to keep one person out can keep everybody out. Quote: “There is a purpose for everyone you meet. Some people come into your life to test you, some to teach you, some to use you, and some to bring out the very best in you.”

I love the idea that some people come to bring out the very best in you regardless whether it was their intention or not. My goal is to take those lemons that they bought for me and make something resembling  lemonade and serve cold lemonade to every thirsty person that passes my way.

Healing doesn’t mean that the pain never was there – it just means that you made up your mind that it will no longer control you. When I stop to reflect on my past, I really don’t remember the ill intentions of those who pass through my life. All that comes to my mind is someone I met in my past, but I no longer live there.

It always feels good to move on. You are no longer living in an abandoned house with no lights. When we stand before God at the end of our lives let’s hope that there will not be one single regret that we did not wish others well despite the wrong they have done.

Someone said, “An eye for any eye will make the whole world blind.” If we keep wishing folks bad, then we are no better than them and the whole world will be a mess. Let’s work towards becoming better and not bitter so we can heal faster from the pain. This will definitely flatten the curve of aggression towards each other.

It’s more polite to build boundaries than walls. Boundaries are your responsibility. Quote: Healthy boundaries are gates and fences that allow you to enjoy the beauty of your own garden.” Who you were yesterday should not be who you are today – it calls for a different version of yourself.  You have a right to put an end to anything that draining your energy or creating toxic behaviour.

2 Timothy 2:23-26 says, “Again I say, don’t get involved in foolish, ignorant arguments that only start fights. A servant of the Lord must not quarrel but must be kind to everyone, be able to teach, and be patient with difficult people. Gently instruct those who oppose the truth. Perhaps God will change those people’s hearts, and they will learn the truth. Then they will come to their senses and escape from the devil’s trap. For they have been held captive by him to do whatever he wants.”

Boundaries allow us to take better care of ourselves – emotionally, mentally, physically, and spiritually. Quote: “You may not be able to control someone’s negative attitude towards you, but you can control how long you participate in it.”

Finally, live at peace with everyone. LIVE! LAUGH! LOVE!

Grown Up Conversations

Truth is like Surgery

When you fill your life with everything else BUT God, it will very soon become monotonous regardless of what it is or who it is. I wish I could emphatically without a second of a doubt say to you that everything you spend most of your waking hours thinking about can be easily be resolved by having a caring spouse, a ‘ride or die’ friend, or even a puppy. But I know you will end up disappointed if I comfort you with a lie.

Some people will only appreciate you as long as you are meeting a need in their life. Don’t blame God for the people that you allow to come into your personal space when you didn’t even consult with Him. The truth is everyone you ever trusted or counted on will somehow disappoint you because GOD IS A JEALOUS GOD.

Psalms 146:3  “Do not put your trust in princes, in mortal men, who cannot save.”

The best relationship to become entangled with is one with a higher power than mere earthlings. If you allow anyone to take the place of God in your life – know for a surety that you will have no control over their loyalty. It may very well have nothing to do with you but the sincere love of your Heavenly Father; or your Mama or grandma’s prayer; or the promised blessing of the former generation.

There are many benefits to having God as your partner in life. He removes people from your life without you having to deal with the mess. He removes them because of where He is taking you next – the next level requires a different you. Your next level requires you making different decisions.

When you are in a relationship with God – He knows how to get you where your destiny awaits you. Hold your peace and do not be afraid of the mess – spread it before the Lord and watch God gave you the courage to turn it your most powerful message.

Faith in a human is of no comparison to having faith in an infallible (foolproof) God. Never underestimate the power of a never-failing God. He will save you from falling blindly into relationships that you cannot see without an MRI, a Ct scan, or any X ray.

God will command His angels to protect you wherever you may go and when you go through difficult times, He stays with you to the end. Ephesians 3:20 says, “God can do anything, you know—far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! He does it NOT by pushing us around but by working within us, his Spirit deeply and gently within us.”

Quote: “Bravery is NOT the absence of fear. Bravery is feeling the fear, the doubt, the insecurity, and deciding that something else is more important.”

If God is all you have, you have all you need. Ask God to show you the way and be content with doing it His way.

Finally, you have been complaining, creating unnecessary drama, playing the victim role, and blaming everyone for your problems – and all those wasted years have gotten you no where closer to your goals or dreams. Let go of the entitlement that people owe you something and trust God to rewrite your story.

Truth is like surgery – it hurts but it treats the wound. Truth is like a debit card pay first and enjoy later.

Grown Up Conversations – October 15 – Video

It’s October – Embrace the seasons of life – it’s only a season

Today’s topic: You are God’s primary concern

We build solid relationships with the hope of finding security, but we keep God as a third wheel moving around with us for emergency cases only.

God cannot be your defense if you build houses for yourself but keep Him on the outside for your emergencies. God is King and Kings sits on thrones.

God wants to have a healthy relationship with you. The lyrics of the song ‘His eye is on the sparrow’ is a reality. Matthew 6:26 ESV “Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they?”

You are God’s primary concern. God helps you handle whatever you’re given. He turns your battles into blessings and as long as He is with you – you will not fail.

Sometimes just having one bad day can take an emotional toll on us making us feel like our life is bad. The truth is, every day is a new day so trust God’s timing for your breakthrough.

No matter what may happen – don’t let go of God’s hand. God can do more for you than you can do for yourself in a lifetime. There’s always a way when God is involved.

True peace comes from knowing that God is always in control regardless of how it appears to you. If we can handle everything then we wouldn’t need God.

I would have lost heart, unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living. Wait on the LORD; be of good courage, and He shall strengthen your heart; wait, I say, on the LORD.” Psalms 27:13 NKJV

Grown Up Conversations – October 14

It’s October – Embrace the seasons of life – it’s only a season.

Quote: “God prunes us when He is about to take us into a new season of growth and expansion.”

No matter how long your favourite season last, we know that it will come to an end. We must prepare to move right into the new season whether it’s your favourite or not.

Going into the unknown always brings about a certain amount of anxiety but Psalms 91 reassures us that we are never alone. God holds all of our tomorrows.

Psalm 91 Easy-to-Read Version

You can go to God Most High to hide. You can go to God All-Powerful for protection.

I say to the Lord, “You are my place of safety, my fortress. My God, I trust in you.” God will save you from hidden dangers and from deadly diseases.

You can go to him for protection. He will cover you like a bird spreading its wings over its babies. You can trust him to surround and protect you like a shield.

You will have nothing to fear at night and no need to be afraid of enemy arrows during the day. You will have no fear of diseases that come in the dark or terrible suffering that comes at noon.

A thousand people may fall dead at your side or ten thousand right beside you, but nothing bad will happen to you! All you will have to do is watch, and you will see that the wicked are punished.

You trust in the Lord for protection. You have made God Most High your place of safety. So nothing bad will happen to you. No diseases will come near your home.

He will command his angels to protect you wherever you go. Their hands will catch you so that you will not hit your foot on a rock. You will have power to trample on lions and poisonous snakes.

The Lord says, “If someone trusts me, I will save them. I will protect my followers who call to me for help. When my followers call to me, I will answer them. I will be with them when they are in trouble. I will rescue them and honor them. I will give my followers a long life and show them my power to save.”

The End

Thought to ponder:

Do not try to hold on to a past season in your life. Seasons change to change you. There’s purpose in every season. Remember, we are more capable than we think.

Grown Up Conversations – October 13

It’s October – Embrace the seasons of life – it’s only a season.

As the seasons change so must we. To everything there is a season. EVERYTHING!

Quote: “A tree with strong roots laughs at storms.”

Psalm 1 New International Version

Blessed is the one who does not walk in step with the wicked or stand in the way that sinners take or sit in the company of mockers, but whose delight is in the law of the Lord, and who meditates on his law day and night.

That person is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither whatever they do prospers.

Not so the wicked! They are like chaff that the wind blows away.

Therefore, the wicked will not stand in the judgment, nor sinners in the assembly of the righteous.

For the Lord watches over the way of the righteous, but the way of the wicked leads to destruction.

The End.

Thoughts to ponder:

  • There’s a clear difference between those who walk with God and those who choose to do life without a fear of God
  • Anyone who walks with God will not be afraid of the storms. When you’re rooted in faith – you will not run scared when hardships come. You will find your peace and tranquility knowing that God will come through for you
  • Those who choose to do life without God will be tossed and confused in every way when faced with a crisis
  • When God is for you WHATEVER you do will prosper and the evidence is visible to all who’s looking on
  • It’s important to pray the Word back to God. Memorize Psalms 1 and seek godly counsel when needed
  • A mustard seed of faith grows with every new challenge. The greater the challenges are – the greater the opportunity is for growth.
  • The LORD watches over those whose faith is rooted in His Word. But the ways of the ungodly leads to destruction

Quotes: “A tree with strong roots laughs at storms.”

“A seed grows with no sound, but a tree falls with huge noise. Destruction has noise, but creation is quiet. This is the power of silence. GROW SILENTLY.”