Defending Your Castle

A castle is a large building usually with high, thick walls and towers that was built in the past to protect against attack. 

A few things come to my mind while defining the word ‘castle’ :

  1. My mind is my castle. It helps me to be aware of my experiences, to think, to feel, helps me to become conscious of my thoughts, helps to reason, to judge, to write, to remember, to concentrate, and to achieve
  2. It is left up to me to build high and thick walls around my castle/mind.  
  3. The towers ( emotionally, mentally and spiritually) must be built to last and to withstand and protect the daily attacks from the outside world. 

As one gets older: the mind struggles with the reality of aging and loneliness. You are no longer on the fast track of life running to and from meetings and achieving deadlines, hustling and jussling making large amount of money. Your time has expired from being the most sort after CEO who made all the brilliant executive decisions for the company. You are no longer the lifeline or umbilical cord for your children who are now all grown up sitting on the Executive Board of directors of their own companies.  Your reserved quiet early morning seat on the A train gradually  becomes an executive seat on the slow coach which quickly without warning sometimes transforms into a wheelchair. 

We need to protect and defend our castle/mind.

First, it will be wise to do a reality check:

Important to note before continuing to read: “Do not dwell on the past. Life changes for EVERYONE every day. Time and years takes care of everything.”

Here we go:

  • Your influence and credibility on the job will be slowly transferred to someone younger and smarter than you. 
  • The savings in the bank will not have the security that it once had on you because there’s nothing more you will need to purchase or no where to go. The house and car is already paid off, your appetite decreases and your diet changes
  • You are now meeting your friends at doctor’s appointments 
  • Your adult children will no longer see themselves as your children but they see you either as friends, foes or a burden
  • Your precious and little smart grandchildren that are your heartbeats will become executives creating their own walk of fame and will not have the luxury of time to sit and cuddle on your lap 
  • The dog will get old and die
  • The house will get too big for you and just having one room will feel like luxury
  • Your clothes don’t fit anymore – either too big or too small but you will not buy anything else because the newest trends are low riders jeans and tops are too revealing 
  • The luxury car will give way to a smaller one
  • Your vacation days will turn into senior trips

It’s all part of life. We watched the same cycle played out in our parents lives and our brilliant and smart kids are watching our lives play out before them. And then, the circle of life continues on…. So, concentrate on the present moment and make your life worth living. Accept the things you cannot change and be strong and courageous knowing you can do anything you put your mind to do. Keep on believing in yourself and turn it into something positive. 

A woman’s mind is cleaner than a man’s: She changes it more often. 

Find humor in as much things as you can and laugh as loud as you can when you can. You have to count your blessings and choose to be happy.  Being prepared for every stage of life preserves your sanity and dignity. Accept those things that cannot change. Life has stages for EVERYONE. Where you are today, your children will be tomorrow.  So don’t throw a pity party but let’s have a welcome to life party. 

Wake up and LIVE!!

We are shaped by our thoughts, we become what we think. Get dressed up. When you dress well, you feel great. Don’t leave the nice clothes for only special occasions, they will become fewer as you get older and your kids will not wear them. Who cares if you are overdressed, just be comfortable. Change your dress shoes into comfy sandals. Get out. Take a walk. Drive, walk or crawl but get outside. Go to the movies more often, they are paid to entertain us. 

Your mind is your castle. Defend your castle…Become aware of your experiences, your feelings, your thoughts, and your achievements. Your emotional, mental and spiritual towers must be built to last and withstand and protect the daily attacks from the world. 

Don’t allow anyone to walk into your Chapter 60 and compare it with their Chapter 10. And you don’t compare your Chapters with anyone else’s…

Go out and have fun even – if you have to walk or crawl, just get outside. Have a tea party with one or two friends on your patio or deck. Yes, you can still have fun in your own unique way. Go to bed early, wake up early and take a nap after lunch. Who cares? There’s nothing to worry about and no excuses or reasons to give. After all, the nest is E M P T Y 💅🏽

Age is a case of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it don’t matter. You must be brilliant enough to entertain a thought without accepting that thought. 

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