I will never know or fully comprehend the extreme pressure of being a firstborn in a family. I’m not a firstborn – and honestly that speaks volumes. I was never expected to take a lead role in the family – as someone was always responsible for holding my hands. I was never forced to endure the “purges” during our Summer vacations as my older siblings, because I guess by time my Mom got to me – she must have been completely exhausted from the drills the older ones may have put her through 🤣 👈🏾 (if you’re unable to see my emoji – it’s a mischievous grin) …I never swept or cleaned the house, nor wash, cook or iron 💃🏾 👈🏾 (dancing lady) …I was not part of the older siblings clan – I’m from a large family. I came a long while after when life was grand 😛 👈🏾 (yep, that grin).
But, being a mother of four girls and seeing them now as mothers too themselves have given me an incredible appreciation of what firstborns had to endure. My girls didn’t have life as difficult as back in my days – their lives were a more blessed life than back in the 50’s … but nevertheless – there was still a great load of expectations that the firstborn or maybe the first two oldest girls had to live up to. Thanks to them both …the younger ones grew up as Princesses.
My oldest daughter was expected to set the standards for learning and being successful at everything she put her hands to do. I remember vividly the green coloured Vocabulary Book that had approximately 5o words on each page that had to be memorized within 4 days to be tested by her teacher every Friday – there was no TGIF moments. The Saturday mornings Mulitpication Tables that was totally torturous now looking back at those days – no weekend was complete till this was done. The late nights assignments that had deadlines had to get done inspite of our family’s hectic lifestyles etc.
The bar of expectation was set high, and thank God that she took up the challenge because she was always happy and fulfilled with her achievements at school – and then later on in life by her resiliency in the Marketplace. She enjoyed competing with any and every one that she met along her pathway. She worked hard at her challenges and she made sure to break her glass ceilings wherever she went in her pathway to success.
I can tell you without a doubt that she didn’t enjoy my strict discipline nor my Mommy made rules, but she tolerated it because she knew her younger sisters were looking on at her. She’s one woman that was never created to handle housework and she’s still doesn’t enjoy doing it (luckily, she can afford help)…BUT, she loves and enjoys the Corporate Life. She’s not one that’s intimidated by men at all – but she totally enjoys looking at a challenge dead in the eye and give it a wink …with a winning smile. Which means, she has assessed her giants and has arrived to her strategy on conquering her opponents. She goes home for the day, and then wakes up early the next day anxiously waiting to enter the Boardroom.
She’s confident and is fully aware of her strengths and weaknesses. She’s not one to look at her weaknesses as failures, but she’s empowered by her strength shown in overcoming weaknesses, huge mistakes, pain and obstacles. She’s soft but strong. She’s cries but stands up and fight again. All these traits and values were embedded in her from the first day we bought home her first sibling. She was no longer an only child but now she had someone to defend, hold hands with, guide and be an example to her younger sisters. Her life took on a whole new level of greater accountability having younger siblings.
Her natural beauty is probably her best comfortable trait. Her beauty goes past being skin deep – her beauty is found in her resilience. She is a beautiful woman who has kept the faith and integrity knowing fully well that there’s no perfect person. I still recall her dressing up as Wonder Woman around the age of 8 years, but with my limited imagination back then, I never thought it was a living role she had assumed from her early childhood.
There’s certainly more that I can write because I’m a writer, but I would like to Honor my firstborn with my post today.
My prayer for her is that she keeps shining brighter and brighter because her younger sisters are still watching 🤗🤗🤗 …you know you inherited them as part of our family heritage 😜, but honestly speaking – you have made us proud of you and your daily accomplishments. You’re our Wonder Woman 😇. I chose this pic with you in my mind for 2017 👇🏾
To my firstborn – thank you for putting up with me and my mistakes as I really didn’t know what I was doing because Google was not around. But, out of my hits and misses – you have turned out to quite a pot of clay that cannot be broken. Okay, enough of my mushy talk that must be driving you insane but I’m writing this blog on behalf of mothers like myself who may have felt like they missed the marks to perfection.
Love you my firstborn forever and forever 💃🏾💃🏾 👈🏾 (two dancing ladies for those who can’t see my emojis).